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 A new year brings a great breath of fresh air. We’ve yet to learn the results of the past two Mondays’ anticipated ratings bout, but we here at the Undisputed Wrestling Alliance are undeniably confident and optimistic about the days, weeks and even year to come. Needless to say, this is going to be a great year. I’ve already issued my predictions for what we should expect, but as the Royal Rumble continues to draw closer at lightning speed, I can’t help but feel an urgency to get the ball rolling in full motion.

 The PPV page finally lists the registered participants (15 from each sub-promotion), and I can’t say that I can pick any one person at this time. With that and the other two matches already scheduled, you can guarantee that the Seventh Installment of the Royal Rumble (as presented by Mmouse Enterprises) will be a must see.

 Bear in mind that the winner of the prestigious battle royal will earn a world heavyweight championship match at the Fourth Oblivion in April. Krusader and Jesus Gonzales fought a match on Raw that determined the first and last entries therein (an opportunity won by the WWF in an agreement struck between both P.A.’s) with Krusader getting the raw end of the deal, courtesy of Terminator’s distraction and Mr. McMahon issued an important address in regards to the PPV, that officially slated the Tag and World Heavyweight Championship matches therefore.

 Is it possible that Krusader could outlast 29 other “hungry” peers, over the course of a grueling hour? What about the expectations that he’ll face Jesus yet again at the very end if he does? The challenge for this icon his tall, and couldn’t be stacked up more against him. Vinnie Mouse may very well lose his “Champion of all women” status as he defends said prize against the bitter women of the WWF. The Soultaker has a difficult task awaiting him in his Last Man Standing defense of the promotional gold against Roberts, but how will the Reaper figure in here?

 The Tag Gold is up for grabs, but can we seriously expect YMCA to pose a genuine threat to the reign of wrestling’s greatest Icons? However, with all of that aside, the real question is who’ll emerge as the champion to defend against the Rumble winner at Oblivion when the Rock defends his coveted title against Mr. PPV?

 Regardless of how you feel about each of these matches, the Royal Rumble will be a MUST SEE!!

THE DICK HAS SPOKEN!!!

 One week away from the return of the UWA from its holiday break, and we find ourselves faced with endless possibilities of what to expect in 2009. The schedules for next week's Raw and Massacre have yet to be announced, but we know that we should expect a hell of a ride in the opening of the road to the Fourth Oblivion, which runs through the seventh edition of the Royal Rumble (the first of which since March 2002).

 We have yet to find out who'll be entered into the traditional 30-man, hour-long battle royal, but you can rest assured that the best of the best will be in participation and only THE BEST will prevail (No intentional reference - whether direct or not - to any particular athlete intended). I understand that there is some chatter within the ranks of the UWA about the next dilemma facing the alliance: the conflict between the ultimate prize for the Rumble winner (a shot at the UWA Championship @ Oblivion) and the UWA rule mandating a bi-UWA PPV match-up between the Promotional Champions of both sub-promotions.

 It turns out that there is already a resolution in the works, but both will be guaranteed. Who should you look out for in 2009? I defer to the following list of the WWF and USWA's 5 with the best potential for breaking out...

USWA: (in no particular order)

 Sunfire - I know what you're thinking; this man is the future of all things great in professional wrestling. Many people are disappointed, even heart broken by his partnership with the evil Dragonfly. Let me just say, don't expect Sunfire to be satisfied with tag gold for long, let alone an alliance with Dragonfly; a man he once refered to as a "wannabe" who wanted to emulate him.

 Steve Austin - could 2009 really be the year that Steve finally redeems a career that started slipping away in the Third Era (UWA/UWF era) of wrestling? I say watch for the old Steve to make a grand return to prominence this year.

 Brandon Lee - he picked a fight with Undertaker last year to restore his credibility and catapult him to relevance, but provoking Undertaker might be a misstep that makes him famous in a manner he didn't initially envision. However, Lee might just suprise us this year.

 Jesse Ventura - Ok, we all know that as one of the top five most influential superstars in all of wrestling, Ventura's performance of late has been pathetic. Chalk most of the blame up to his interaction with Dibiase and the infancy of what most may suspect to be the resurrection of the Million Dollar Corporation. In 2009, I fully expect a turnaround for Ventura, and the collapse of Dibiase's whole operation.

 Rob Van Dam - he's already captured the UWA World Heavyweight Championship for a spell, do you honestly think he's through? Please.

WWF:

 Kevin Nash - The longest reign of immunity since Olson in 04'. Nash is a monster and a threat to the UWA's pseudo-stability as long as he holds on to that veil of immunity from consequences. Just ask DDP and his Health Provider. Look for the WWF to become Nash's playground in 09'.

 Raphael - 08' started out nicely for one of the First Eras greats. It held promise after he stunned all critics with his Second Coming victory over Nash. Then he hit a landmine, named Michelangelo. With their feud resolved, as of Motivation 4, I expect Raphael to finally make a break for greatness one way or another.

 Krusader - after having been bogged down with his ancient feud with Terminator that was revived at From Dusk Til Dawn, courtesy of his loving cousin, Krusader will likely bring a close to aforementioned feud before the spring and may stand as the only hope WWF has of finally bringing the UWA gold home.

 Stamboli - if anyone were to have been selected as suprise comeback or break-out star of 2008, it would've been Stamboli, whose actually taken the UWA by storm. As the new king of hardcore, Stamboli might just be the blue chipper of the WWF in 2009.

 Chris Jericho - I was delighted when Mickey drafted him in May, and am ecstatic about the prospects for this man's future in the WWF. With Krusader being the one to carry the torch - as per my projections - , Stamboli serving as the blue chipper, and Nash controlling the yard, Jericho will likely assume the position of stand-by face, ready to pick up if Krusader drops the ball, and will secure that position upon capturing the Intercontinental Championship - again, as per my projections - , needless to say; 2009 is Jericho's year to take the helm of the WWF's last generation.

 Beyond these projections, there are rumors floating around about potential acquisitions and even returns. I can neither confirm or deny the speculation by this point, but I will say that looking forward to said confirmation or denial will make for a more entertaining year of wrestling and may very well establish this year as the year to watch the UWA!

 The world has turned here in the UWA.

 With the buyrate returns in from Bedlam, it is becoming increasingly apparent that our luck may very well be turning for the best. This past Monday's A Night of Violence is slightly expected to do well, but all eyes are on this Monday's show. Mickey seems to have taken my advice in broadening his focus beyond the PPV realm, because his central focus on Monday was "unity" in order to strengthen the quality of our weekly broadcasts.

 This Monday will feature a number of high quality matches, including an interpromotional bout between Rob Van Dam and Goldberg. Last week, Goldberg officially lost more matches than he's won and hopes to turn that around with a WWF victory over the USWA. RVD, on the otherhand, went out on a limb and challenged the World Champion, FRED, despite the fact that he has a busted left knee and a bad back. Quite frankly, Goldberg's chances of turning things around look very good, unless he's too distracted by the endless antics of Chris Jericho to capitalize.

 Jesse Ventura, still disoriented in the absence of Car, will compete against an angry Keeper, looking to regain his footing after the stunning defeat he suffered last week to HBP. The WWF will host the first of two "Number One Contendership" matches to decide who will compete in the Breaking Point match for the Intercontinental Championship. After Elijah Burke's victory over Raphael in tag action last week, he has a real shot at capturing gold in this month's PPV spectacle. Then again, never underestimate the determination of Raphael.

 The Edge will defend his Hardcore Championship against the man he defeated last week. I don't know why Edge accepted the challenge, he's past McMahon, but I guess logic means nothing to some people. Edge will have to watch out for Credible as Justin is sure to be nearby. Need I mention the return of Sunfire? I can't even remember who his opponent is, because Sunfire overshadows him too much. There's no doubt in my mind that this match alone will win over the crowd and audiences at home.

 Then we look to the dual main events. In the USWA's feature presentation; it will be a blast from the past. A return to the old-days of USWA when the admonished Slammu battled it out with the incredibly popular Masked Phenom. This is going to be big. How is the WWF going to follow a blockbuster like that? With Nash v. Roberts. Both have had issues with Soultaker in the past, and now Roberts looks to improve his record in attempting to gain a victory over the reigning Immunity Champion. Regardless of how this all pans out, you can rest assured that Soultaker won't be too far away.

 Just stay tuned, because the road to Breaking Point looks to be just as - if not more - interesting as the path to Bedlam last month.

 THE DICK HAS SPOKEN!!!

 On the eve of September 11th, the aftermath of Summerslam has wrought much for the UWA. We know not what the buyrate for said PPV was, or how we fared against the EWA in competition that night. But we do see a very definitive picture coming together for the path to Bedlam.

 So far, the USWA Sub-Promotional PPV has produced two matches; the UWA World Heavyweight Championship Triple Threat Match and the first encounter (probably ever) between the Austin Brothers. Not too bad so far, but how does such a thing register with the fans?

 The real numbers have yet to be seen, but from a marketing standpoint; it could make for a third consecutive blockbuster PPV for this organization.

...Allow me to digress for a second to address a little problem for Mickey here. Mickey has always been heralded as a champion in the Pay-Per-View realm, always pushing the envelope and breaking barriers with respect to buyrates (or rates as a whole for that matter). But when considering the "loss" to the EWA in July and ultimately to the HCW in the "first PPV" category (maybe even last month); it is reasonable to say that it is high time that the Chairman of Mmouse Enterprises expands his focus from PPVs exclusively to include the dual-weekly events on Monday Night. Honestly, we live in the most competitive era this industry has ever seen and can't afford to approach such with a myopic preference for focusing solely on PPVs! Wake up Mickey!!

 Back to our original subject...there are a number of potential battles for Bedlam, including Brandon Lee/Undertaker, Slammu/Krazy Kid, HBP/Keeper and possibly even a battle of the bulge between the Powerhouses and Demolition. Frankly, I'd love to see a rematch between Rock and RVD, but that's just me. Early word from the calculations of Summerslam's success show that two of the highest rated matches within were the Cage and Concussion matches and I would just have to say that it would be wise for the USWA to capitalize upon this opportunty to cash in on both.

 Anyways, with the pre-Massacre/RAW previews for the 15th up, we get a good look into what can be expected from both programs, including a special announcement from the controversial P.A. in the USWA as well the 48th Edition of the pop-culture favorite; Crock Show. I hear Crock has special plans in store for the 50th Edition on the 29th...stay tuned.

THE DICK HAS SPOKEN!!!

 Boy has it been a mightly long time since my last update. Quite a bit has transpired in the weeks since the UWA stood in the dark about the outcome from the first week in ratings war. We now know what came out of that blood bath and each one between then and now. It is quite a shame that the heavily hyped launch of the so-called weekly UWA Double-threat of Massacre/Raw turned out to be a tragic flop. Only one victory in the ratings has spawned from the tireless efforts of UWA writers and Superstars and I couldn't be more disappointed.

 Honestly, when reviewing the corporate trash talk and compare it with the beat downs we've received since (one from the EWA and the rest from the HCW), I'd say that we here in the UWA have had a healthy dose of foot-in-mouth medicine.

 Word has it that our luck is turning around with the momentum from a very successful Summerslam at our backs, coupled with a large portion of the EWA and HCW's fan base returning to school. I've heard that a significant drop in viewership and thusly the rates is to be expected. Here's to hoping that all of these factors work to our advantage. It better, because it's our last hope.

THE DICK HAS SPOKEN!!!

 The UWA is back with a vengeance!! As the Second Coming brought in the highest numbers thus far in the wake of From Dusk til Dawn and undeniably crushed the viewership of both the EWA and HCW's opening day events; we now await final word as to which Monday Show out of EWA Revolution, HCW Mayhem, WWF Raw and USWA Massacre came out on top. The brawl is said to have been so close that the numbers have been counted and recounted by the Nielsen Ratings people.

So, what did we see in the first week of action in the UWA? History. I need not be redundant and mention what has readily been so evident in this landmark week of wrestling, but there is no question that the first week in UWA has been amazing.

 The tag team of Rock and RVD appears done for, the Austins teamed up to come out shy of a victory, Dragonfly tested and was demolished by an angry FRED, Crock's Show returned as the Crock accumulated and now presently holds more victories than anyone else in the WWF and is tied with Lesnar and Jones in the USWA.

 The Crock of the WWF certainly punked the USWA's Undertaker at the Second Coming and will look to repeat that success as he capitalizes on his contendership for the WWF Gold this monday. This will rival the USWA's own crowning of its promotional champion on Monday Massacre, and I have to say that I'm looking forward to both.

 What more can we expect in the ongoing saga involving Rock and RVD? Whatever it is, we can't expect it to be pretty in the wake of Rock's despicable decision to leave RVD hanging out to receive a beating at the hands of Strike Force.

 Method will seek to maintain the momentum they amassed following their victory over John Godwinn, thus giving that racist pig a heart attack in tag tournament action. We can also expect the second attempt at a ring return by Krusader this week as he seeks to heel the wounds created by his unjust defeat at FDTD due to the intervention of Terminator.

 Lesnar and Jones are slated to team up again, but this time in the tournament as Leonardo will attempt a second victory in a row. Lastly, prior to the USWA Championship determination; Jesse Ventura will battle another giant in Maxx Steel. I just have to wonder if Jesse will end up regretting the way he treated Dibiase on Monday.

 Either way, you can rest assured that the UWA will be on fire this week.

THE DICK HAS SPOKEN!!!

 So, the UWA isn't advertising the Second Coming enough now? It has now become a forgotten event? Please...

 With all that we know already about the long anticipated return of the new and improved Undisputed Wrestling Alliance; the promotion's opening day is poised to be the most successful of any opening day in wrestling history. The first of which to be offered on Pay Per View.

 Everybody wants to see what will come of an event that we will review now:

 The Austins will team up for - to my recollection - the first time ever against another never before tagged group of wrestlers in Brock Lesnar and Nathan Jones in a match fueled seemingly by nothing short of curiousity. It appears as if Shane McMahon was attempting to premptively upstage Murrey by kicking off the UWA's second coming with a bang. Two of these wrestlers are not well known, having experienced their best days in the independent circuit with a few brief runs in big promotions, whereas the other two are well known, but have had rough times in their most recent days of peak exposure.

 Honestly, I am expecting a brutal battle to the end between these teams. Whether the brothers pull off the victory, or the combination of powerhouses excel; I'm sure the fans will enjoy it all together.

 Jeff Murrey kind of mixes things up a bit with the unlikely booking of a match pitting Kevin Nash against Raphael. There has been a lot of confusion over why this match was set in the first place, but Murrey always has had a knack for pulling out unexpected twists in framing his shows. Maybe Murrey wanted to put Raphael's rusty ring skills to the test against a superstar who established himself in the era of his absence. Either way, it'll be interesting to see exactly how the turtle fairs in his first singles match in nearly a generation.

 The USWA's Promotional Administrator throws another tag match at us for the second match from his promotion, but this time; it's a tournament match for the UWA tag titles between the Guy and "Exciting" Lance Storm and the former UWF Tag Team sensational pairing of Rock and RVD. My money's on the experienced team, but with the uncertainty over how The Guy and Storm will work out alongside the fallout from the WOW tournament upset experienced by their opponents; this one could be up in the air as well. The fans will be in store for a treat either way...

 Murrey retaliates with another mix up of unprecedent proportions as he decides the first Hardcore Champion of the new era in a random match between Hans Gustav and Elroy Crash. No one appears to expect much out of Elroy, but we could be underestimating a guy who's seen a lot of training in the years following his disappearance from the spotlight. Then again, Gustav is a man without a conscience and is unlikely to show even a hint of mercy as he delivers his best to achieve what he yearns for; victory!

 Not much has been heard from Slammu since he lost to and witnessed his best friend achieve the greatest accomplishment in wrestling history before congratulating him. What does that say about what we can look forward to on the 4th when he combats a very outspoken opponent who insists that Slammu will not even present a formidable challenge to his uprising? It all ensures that independence day will be a day to watch wrestling...these two are likely to tear each other apart to climb the ladder and move beyond their losses at From Dusk til Dawn.

 WWF frontman, Murrey is swift to return the favor with another incredible gift to crown his first promotional champion in a bout between the Hulkster and Soultaker. A huge match it is with the potential of rocking the wrestling world. Either way, the first promotional champion of the WWF will be a well established and respected athlete.

 Then there's the Interpromotional Main Event match with the USWA's Undertaker going toe to toe with WWF's Crock. Besides the fact that Crock will probably be exhausted from his search for a replacement sidekick, the battle between the UWF's first champion and UWA's last champion of it's first run is sure to deliver. In the end, these two will succeed in sending off the show with a bang.

 After looking over this schedule...it is hard to even imagine the most anul of critics claiming that their enthusiasm for such a card is fading. Just remember, the matches aren't all that we'll see come the 232nd birthday of this great nation, and that's something to remain psyched about...

THE DICK HAS SPOKEN!!!

The clock is ticking, the countdown has begun and now we know some of the details of what to expect when all of this come to fruition. With recent announcements pertaining to the first installments of Raw, Massacre and Sanitarium; we are now gathering a general idea of what these show have to offer come the second week of July.

Some critcs have readily weighed on what little we are allowed to know about these cards, and quite frankly; their judgment is a little premature. We haven't any idea as to what matches may or may not be announced at/after the Second Coming, so any judgment cast now would be slightly disingenuous.

I can understand the frustration with all the secrecy, but when you consider the fact that the people constructing all of this haven't done so since "From Dusk 'Til Dawn" and since 2005 before that, you realize that it may take a moment for all the chips to fall into place. Plus, there is plenty to look forward to with what we know: Massacre's Leonardo/Giggy match holds promise in the return of a beloved veteran and the introduction of an independent circuit success to the mainstream. In fact, sources tell me that Giggy will be featured in an upcoming profile interview prior to opening day.

Then there's the Severn,Vicious/YMCA match slated for tournament advancement determination pitting two well-known ruthless athletes against another group of rookies who have the entire wrestling world talking weeks before they arrive.

On Raw, the Ahmed Johnson/Rob Conway bout should stir some interest considering the phenomenal skills these two men possess in the ring. Both were successful in tag action and will be tested in singles competition upon their return to the ring.

Not much criticism was mentioned in regards to the Credible/Burke meeting, because every onlooker knows that these men may very well command the attention of the wrestling world on July 7th. Nor did I see any complaints on the return of the Crock Show, why? Because there isn't a person alive that doesn't want to know what Woody Woodstrum the Third will do next.

Now that I think about it, not one word was negatively uttered in reference to Saturday Sanitarium's prospective schedule, and that is undoubtedly due to the fact that the EWA expects - according to my sources - a merciless beating every night "Uprising" faces off against it, starting with July 12th.

The fact is, most people choose to ridicule others when they have nothing superior to offer. Afterall, when is the EWA going to announce more on what to expect on the first edition of "Revolution" and "Uprising" besides a vague description that reveals two "qualifying matches" for the "Elite" World Championship to feature two unknowns and a dry-hump fest between Olson and Goldust? If they want to excite the Dick or any of the Dick's company, they will have to try harder than this.

THE DICK HAS SPOKEN !!!